Stop Waiting for Validation

Erik Cooper —  July 7, 2010 — 6 Comments

There are a lot of arrogant, isolated, self-reliant, “I’m never wrong” jerks in this world. (I contemplated stronger language, but I think you get the picture).  You’re probably visualizing a few right now.

But honestly, I think there’s a much more dangerous epidemic.

An epidemic of self-protection. A sickness that defines itself by validation from others. A disease that stifles conviction, and forces God-given potential back into the turtle shell of self-doubt.

It’s ugly.  It’s sinful.  And it’s something I battle daily in my own life.

Below is an excerpt from my personal journal. A little butt kicking I got from God last week (He wears big shoes, but I think they’re Toms. Soft soles).  A bit of a pep talk that may mean something to you, too.


Stop waiting for others to define or validate you. If you blow it, blow it BIG.  And blow it based on a deep conviction you feel in your heart.  Stop waiting for a wave to ride.  Go create a wave!

Stop mentally adjusting to criticism you haven’t really heard, but imagine or anticipate. That’s CRAZY!  Put what you think out there.  If others disagree, – listen, critique, adjust if needed – but don’t hide out of fear of rejection or criticism. You’re big enough to handle that.

Listen for God’s voice, but when you hear as much as a whisper – GO!  Run!  Stop waiting for others to give you permission. Stop trying to hedge your potential for mistakes.  Stop being a slave to opinion.  Start being a true follower of Christ.

Does any of this resonate with you?  Are you ever paralyzed by the fear of screwing things up? Of facing shame from those who may see things differently?  Are you avoiding creating, injecting, speaking, writing, asking, or starting something today because you lack the courage to face the criticism if you’re wrong?

What if we feared missing a God-0pportunity more than we feared making a mistake?

6 responses to Stop Waiting for Validation

  1. Thanks for writing this, E. It’s been the story of my life. It’s been very freeing to begin telling the people in my head to shut up.

    The question, “What if we feared missing a God-opportunity more than we feared making a mistake?” is the pivot point for change. Thanks for putting it out there. Gonna write it down and put it somewhere I can see it.

  2. Needed this today… Thanks! 🙂

  3. thanks G’uvner. you are so right on the mark. I too have a problem with this on a daily basis.

    • Actually Bill, your comments on this issue while we were in Honduras have been rolling around in my head. I’ve been quoting you to a few people (seriously). Great to “see” you tonight my friend.

  4. So Erik, have you been reading my journal? Loved this, very timely.
    I pray that I fear missing a God opportunity every time, over the fear of making a mistake.
    Appreciate your gift of writing.

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